I was a freshman in High School when the tragedy at Columbine occurred. I remember the locked doors of the school, silently staring at my desk listening intently to the radio with my classmates. The hollow feeling, those kids were my age, my peers, and not even that far away. I remember track practice that day. The inappropriate gun jokes seemingly all of us were telling. Making fun of the school for locking us down, boasting about how not-scared we were, and mocking the school for being so overprotective. We were all scared, we knew it, not one of us escaped the uneasy feeling of really facing our own mortality for perhaps the first time. I remember the quiet but short car ride after practice, as always I got a ride from my dad. "How are you doing Nathan?" he asked solemnly. "Fine Dad" I lied a little, then smiled. He knew better "Please, if you need to talk about it don't hesitate. I'm here for you, so is your mom." "I know." I replied. We never really did talk about what happened that day, but knowing my parents were there for me was enough, knowing my sister was safe at home was enough. My selfish teenage brain was a blessing, keeping me from realizing the full magnitude of the events of that day.
After that day, the media storm was in full force. Politicians began pounding their fists, some screaming for rigid gun control, others declaring the tragedy would have been avoided by an armed public. It was sickening. 15 kids, 15 of my peers were dead, the blood in the library barely dry. Thousands stood in candlelight vigils, and for some reason in the midst of the tears shed by a shattered community, divisive politics were on the lips of those we are supposed to look to for guidance. All that ignorance has only been amplified by social media Twitter, Facebook.
Today, for the first time in my life I wept because of the words I heard on a news broadcast. Unwrapped toys sit at the feet of twenty Christmas trees, toys that were meant to bring happiness now only bring tears. Twenty bedrooms sit empty, sheets still out of place from the morning wake up routine. Parents will step on lost Lego's buried in the carpet, and instead of a flash of anger, will feel the terrible pains of an unfathomable loss. Laughter in homes, evening baths, family dinners, have all been replaced with silence, grief, and sorrow. Not to mention the loss of the light of six people that dedicated their lives to children.
This is a time to mourn loss, to reflect, to grieve. To pray for the families, and to hug yours a little tighter. This is not a time for politics, for political gain, and positioning.This is not a time for divisive language, or actions. So before you get on your soap box, please stop, think, and don't... just don't.
Great post, and great perspective. I can't imagine how much harder this news was to hear about as a father.
ReplyDeleteI certainly made my little Facebook soapbox stand today, but not for political reasons. Frankly, I can't comprehend the gun issue as being a political one, because to me, it's not political. It's more important than that. It's literally life and death. I can't stand it when people play the "too soon" card after a mass shooting; when children are dead, it's far too late. (I'm not accusing you of doing that, by the way – just making a point.)
What's sad to me is not that people use divisive language, but that tragedies like these become divisive at all. We should all want to unite in any way possible to prevent something like this from ever happening again, because there is no one in this country who wasn't struck by the awfulness of what happened today. And yet we'll keep yelling about laws and rights and the constitution because it's easier to point the finger at someone (or something) than to actually generate any sort of real change.
Anyhow, thanks for the insight. With all due respect, I will continue to soapbox every time something like this happens (because sadly, I don't think this is the last time). I feel that if the issue isn't addressed during its most painful and real manifestations, nothing will ever change.
I'm glad you, your kids, and your family are safe. Stay that way, and take care of each other. Keep up the good writing.
Ryan
In a way, the statement to not politicize a tragedy is a political statement because it endorses the status quo. I also think that jumping up and shouting about guns the minute a body hits the floor and scrambling to write a law, some law, any law inevitably named after a child that was a victim serves little purpose but to make us feel like it won't happen again. We need to take a deep breath, think about these families, these children, and what they are going through. Above all you are right, we need to not panic. When we are ready to move forward we need to do so with a clear head because while we are busy screaming about things that are easy to scream about its much too easy to miss how we can make things better instead of just feel better
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